Most people know me as a studious kid. But I will now uncover some of the hidden truths of my life. I was never able to do things that I hate. An early example comes when I was 11 years old. I had to study a 3rd language- Hindi. I hated it like hell. I was very good in all subjects, but ordinary in hindi. In my highschool, my marks sheet looked unusual, with high 90's in math and science, and low 60's in social science. Once I failed in biology, in 12th. People around me, were emphasizing a lot on 'orderliness' and stuff...which I was never able to acheive; however, those suggestions, initiated an intellectual conflict in my mind. However, the first time I got the freedom to experiment on this conflict was when I came to IIT.
I planned a systematic waste of time in IIT. (good utilization of freedom!) As it turned out, all sensible and useful works that I did, was during the hours I planned to waste! It was the effect of the freedom given to the flow of thought. Finally, I understood that, the world is governed by randomness. Getting 'ordered' is a challenge to randomness. And hence, it failed..atleast in my case. These thoughts are deeper than they appear. They dont actually mean that one should live like a lazy drunkard.
The Story Of The Dog And The Monkey
In the last summer, back at home, I didnt feel like sleeping, one night. Towards the end of the night, one thought occured to my mind. It's the story of the dog and the minkey. A dog, never denies his masters order. It does exactly what the master wants it to do. On the other hand, a monkey, is known for it's restlessness. It does a lot of random stuff. The dog, cannot do what his master can't think of . A monkey, is capable of that. It goes beyond the span of it's master's mind, simply because it is more random in its approach. That is where is the hidden power of randomness. It's the monkey's attitude, which brings out something new to the world; not the dog's attitude. More precisely, it is the respect given to randomness in the monkey's attitude, which does the trick. So, if being notorious is useful, be notorious!.
However, the conflict is still on, in my mind. Confusion, which persists, looks to be a very essential entity. Thought says, life is not about getting out of such confusions quickly; it is the conflict of contradicting thoughts in the mind. Again, these thoughts too are in the conflict!(:D :D...the last one was a joke, a self reference)